Once again I have to thank Mr. Boortz for his ever enlightening offerings.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dfPjWQQDu3c
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
For My Mormon Friends Out There
It seems that every time I leave a Sunday school class, a testimony meeting, or any other "faith" related activity in which there are more than 3 Mormons present I must search out my cocktail of a xanax and an ultram to quell the desire to hit myself in the head with a hammer to end the pain. Since I am doing all I can to not join the ranks of Mormons who nearly single handedly support the Prozac and Zoloft industry, I have to get a few things off my chest. If you cannot handle the truth, you need not read further.
1. Big Love is an entertaining show. Deal with it. Its seems to me that the same people who pass the petitions around their local ward to protest HBO are the same ones who threw a fit when Mr. Dutcher broadcast to the world via "Brigham City" a typical Mormon sacrament service. I've never seen any of my fellow Mormons go to war when a Catholic communion is broadcast over cable TV. I guess we only fight our own battles eh?
2. Joseph Smith NEVER said that if one knew what the Telestial Kingdom was like, one would kill themself to get there. This is an old chestnut of the old school Mormons and yet in all my readings I can't seem to place the quote. In fact, every person who I have asked to cite where they get this ridiculous idea suddenly draws a blank and promises to get back to me on where they "just read it". Still waiting for that to happen.
3. The phrase "Sacred not Secret"? Whatever. You and I both know that there are things we are told to keep secret. There is no shame in that. Why do we always try to play it off as "sacred" when we are not equipped to give an outsider the answer?
4. Nephite warriors do not guard the temple doors at night. That's the damn dumbest thing I have ever heard come out of Utah.
5. If you believe that when you go to heaven people will kneel at your feet and that the corridors of heaven will become hushed because you lived at the time of President Hinckley, then you're an idiot. This was a favorite quote passed around all over California when I lived there. It was read over the pulpit more than once and was attributed to everyone from Henry B. Eyring to Brigham Smith. Its a bunch of crap people. No one will bow at your feet just because you lived at a certain time in the history of the world. Get over yourself.
6. Contrary to what many in my own family believe, no grandmother of mine ever saw Cain drinking out of a gutter in Salt Lake. Seriously people.
7. You can count those who qualify to be sons of perdition on one hand. Yet another fable passed down through Mormondom to strike curiosity into our hearts and give the High Priest Group something to debate.
8. Children who are disabled were those who personally led Satan and his minions out of Heaven after the War in Heaven, Or perhaps it was them that fought on the "front lines". Huh? Now I can see how this might bring some of us a little comfort when seeking answers to why some are born with things like Down Syndrome or Cerebral Palsy. I have a little sister who has CP and you know what? there is no explanation for it. There is nothing they did or didn't do to end up with such a malady. Sometimes shit happens. Don't cheapen their struggle by justifying it with a lame excuse such as these so that the world can make sense in your head.
9. John wrote the book of Revelation, NOT the book of RevelationS! Lose the "S"! I really hate this one.
1. Big Love is an entertaining show. Deal with it. Its seems to me that the same people who pass the petitions around their local ward to protest HBO are the same ones who threw a fit when Mr. Dutcher broadcast to the world via "Brigham City" a typical Mormon sacrament service. I've never seen any of my fellow Mormons go to war when a Catholic communion is broadcast over cable TV. I guess we only fight our own battles eh?
2. Joseph Smith NEVER said that if one knew what the Telestial Kingdom was like, one would kill themself to get there. This is an old chestnut of the old school Mormons and yet in all my readings I can't seem to place the quote. In fact, every person who I have asked to cite where they get this ridiculous idea suddenly draws a blank and promises to get back to me on where they "just read it". Still waiting for that to happen.
3. The phrase "Sacred not Secret"? Whatever. You and I both know that there are things we are told to keep secret. There is no shame in that. Why do we always try to play it off as "sacred" when we are not equipped to give an outsider the answer?
4. Nephite warriors do not guard the temple doors at night. That's the damn dumbest thing I have ever heard come out of Utah.
5. If you believe that when you go to heaven people will kneel at your feet and that the corridors of heaven will become hushed because you lived at the time of President Hinckley, then you're an idiot. This was a favorite quote passed around all over California when I lived there. It was read over the pulpit more than once and was attributed to everyone from Henry B. Eyring to Brigham Smith. Its a bunch of crap people. No one will bow at your feet just because you lived at a certain time in the history of the world. Get over yourself.
6. Contrary to what many in my own family believe, no grandmother of mine ever saw Cain drinking out of a gutter in Salt Lake. Seriously people.
7. You can count those who qualify to be sons of perdition on one hand. Yet another fable passed down through Mormondom to strike curiosity into our hearts and give the High Priest Group something to debate.
8. Children who are disabled were those who personally led Satan and his minions out of Heaven after the War in Heaven, Or perhaps it was them that fought on the "front lines". Huh? Now I can see how this might bring some of us a little comfort when seeking answers to why some are born with things like Down Syndrome or Cerebral Palsy. I have a little sister who has CP and you know what? there is no explanation for it. There is nothing they did or didn't do to end up with such a malady. Sometimes shit happens. Don't cheapen their struggle by justifying it with a lame excuse such as these so that the world can make sense in your head.
9. John wrote the book of Revelation, NOT the book of RevelationS! Lose the "S"! I really hate this one.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Where is the wind beneath my wings?
I seem to have lost the wind that blows my blogging sails across the ocean of the internet. I don't really know what is wrong with me. I suppose like all new things, my interest has feigned. I apologize that I am not more like my sister, who, even though she has barely enough time to shop for "FS" bargains, still finds time to update her family business on the web. I suppose that my blogging habits lean more towards the side of procrastination rather than ambition. What I mean is that instead of catching up on the immense amount of over due homework that I have, I would rather creep and crawl around the blog-o-sphere. In fact I sometimes find it amusing to peruse the other blogs and leave comments under names such as "PedalFiler" and "40MarriedandLooking". Why am I amused by such simple creepy things? I don't have the answer for that. Although I will put a disclaimer out there that me and Swaney3 are not the same man. Wasn't it Norman Bates that said we all go a little crazy sometimes?
As an odd side note, I don't care what anyone says, Creed is what makes "The Office" work.
As an odd side note, I don't care what anyone says, Creed is what makes "The Office" work.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)