The Pyramids!

Today we went and saw the Great Pyramids of Giza. You know, you can see those things in pictures and books, but you never really realize the work and effort that it took to build them. However, while there I did a little digging of my own and yes dad, I found that levitation device that the aliens used to put those ginormous blocks into place. I even bagged it up and I am calling it your Christmas present. Along with a few rocks from the pyramid of Cheops. ( Hey I am American, they expect that dont they?) We also found out that camels are probably the smelliest animal on the face of the earth. And the stink doesn't come off either. By the time we were done with our ride around the pyramids we felt as though the camels had ridden us. And who ever said the Sphinx was huge was wrong. A little disappointed, but still amazed. Oh, and by the way, Linda was right: I do look Arabic or so the Egyptian vendors tell me as they try to sell me their treasures. I guess it's a compliment? We stopped by the Cairo Museum that is right across from our hotel. Half of the worlds history sits in that one building at take it from me, once you have seen one mummy they all look the same. Literally tons and tons of history and it all looks the same. I would still recommend it on your next stop in Egypt. Now I am not going to lie to you, those Egyptians must have been lookers back in the day. Everything from combs to rings and all other sorts of jewelry is on display at the museum. Pretty impressive. By the way we are taking orders for sand and rocks. Yes, that will count as your Christmas present.

How Bazzar!

So let me ask a question: Do I look like MacGyver? Well apparently to the Egyptians I do. Seems like everywhere we went at the local swap meet on Saturday night people thought they were in the midst of a celebrity: Hulk Hogan. Now that I can understand but MacGyver? Didn't he have a mullet? Anywho, yes we safely got into Egypt late Friday night. Everything went well except for the fact that I came to the realization that I am grossly obese. I am telling you they didn't make those airplane seats for Hulk Hogan, thats for sure. Its very strange to see so many people shout "Barack Obama" at you, one fella said he liked him because they were both the same color. However, when you say "George Bush" with a thumbs up their expression quickly becomes sour, Damn Democrats! Ally didn't mind the pushy salesmen though as they showered her with compliments. Well I guess they were compliments. I believe that several times she was offered to leave her fat American husband and join a harem. She declined, thankfully. Her "beautiful eyes" seemed to be the charmer for the dirty little pervert men who wanted to swoon her into the wilds of Cairo. We quickly learned that it pays to be the rude American by simply pushing your way past the salesman, at least you can keep your money in your wallet.

Off We Go!

So what do Frank the hound dog and Janna have in common? Turns out they both prefer Princess' dog food to eat. Hmmmm. I am not quite sure how much puppy chow Janna gets while at her Nana's house, but she seems to be rolling over on command now so I guess that's progress? Ok, bad joke. Anywho, so in case ya didn't know, Ally and myself are getting ready to head out. We are taking a little trip across the pond and over the hill to Egypt. Somehow we got wrangled into taking a 2 week vacation over there with Allison's parents and her brother. Its gunna be tough but I think we'll survive. We are leaving the freezing temperatures of Colorado for the 90 degree weather of Cairo, Alexandria, and whatever they keep the room temperature at on the cruise ship that we'll be sailing up and down the Nile on. 90 degrees may sound pretty good to some of you but I on the other hand tend to sweat ( I refer you to the "What the hell happened to me" post) If we get the chance, we will post pictures of ourselves amid the pyramids and other touristy places that you have your picture taken at with the full intention of making you jealous. We hope it works. And yes, all of our Christmas gifts to you this year will be from our trip. Take heart though, we do spend about a day in Amsterdam and I hear they have some pretty "cool" stuff there. So if I can find enough room in my body cavities, you will all get a special little treat.

P.S.- If we take a dive into the Atlantic, Jackie you get Janna, but you have to take Frank too. Dad you can have all of my expensive books that I never read along with all my debt. Mom, you just make sure Dog Dog lives out his retirement years in comfort. Kassie, well you pretty much have everything already. If the plane crashes but they never find any wreckage, contact a man named Charles Widmore.